‘F’ is for . . . Fisher and Ivy by Andy Jones
I shouted the F-word in a Waterstones last week. Bellowed it, in fact. Although I doubt it’s the first time this has happened.
Imagine dropping Moby Dick on your foot: ‘F**k!’
Or opening the latest Katie Price biography: ‘F@#K THIS!’
Or realising that you’re going to have to eat steak with a blunt knife, yet again: ‘WHAT KIND OF F*#KING PLACE IS THIS?’*
But it was a first for me. This was my first official reading and book signing, in my birthplace no less. Not Waterstones. (That’s another one, isn’t it: ‘GET ME SOME GAS AND F**KING AIR!!!!!’). But Liverpool. Books and the City had organised an event with myself and fellow authors, Iona Grey and Jane Costello. We drank pink fizz, read excerpts and signed books. My parents came, old friends, in-laws, an uncle, and my cousin had a nine-quid spray tan specially for the occasion. To say it was a blast would be an understatement.
So that F-bomb…
Well, there was a good reason (besides seeing the expression on my editor’s face. Sorry, Clare). Simon & Schuster had hosted a private blogger event in February, and during the Q&A we realised it was hard (practically impossible, in fact) to talk about my book, The Two of Us, without revealing a significant plot twist that occurs around about page 50. It’s a big deal, propelling the story forward and exerting a huge pressure on the lives and relationship of the main characters, Fisher and Ivy.
So Clare and I made the decision that from now on, we were going to reveal this hitherto secret plot point – after all, there are many more surprises throughout the remainder of the novel. An added bonus of this plot candour is that I now have broader choice of excerpts to read in public. Like the one I read in Liverpool that began with Ivy bellowing the F-word. (And anyway, numerous readers of the ebook have divulged this twist within their reviews, so what the hell.)
I think we got away with it. No one called security, no one stood up and walked out. I even signed a few books afterwards.
The official launch of my paperback is Thursday May 7th (tomorrow, as I write this), and we’re holding a launch party in an independent bookshop in Wimbledon Village tonight. It’s fitting, as a large part of the novel is set in the Village. And it’s convenient because I can stagger home afterwards. I’m fantastically excited. I’ll have a few friends there, a few bloggers and my amazing team from Simon & Schuster. I’m not sure if they‘re going to let me read or not, but if they do … well, I think I’ve given away enough secrets for now, don’t you?
*A water stone is a tool used for sharpening knives. Now you know.